A reader writes: I am a department head at a small financial firm. Recently I began hosting weekly meetings for our 25-person business team, which is comprised of other department heads and their teams. For the first couple of weeks, things were going relatively smoothly, but recently one department head has been hijacking every meeting. He shows up late, he stands during the meeting instead of sitting (which isn’t really a problem other than the fact that it is distracting and odd), and he interrupts people’s presentations to interject his own thoughts, opinions, and agendas.

You might think that if you do good work, that’s all your boss will care about. But most managers care an enormous amount about attitude and interpersonal skills as well. If you’ve ever been told you have a “bad attitude” or an “attitude problem,” that’s a real danger sign for your career, or at least for your current job. At U.S. News & World Report today, I break down what “bad attitude” really means. You can read it here. and when should and shouldn’t you talk to them? what does it mean if your boss says you have a “bad attitude”? work habits

It’s the Friday open thread! The comment section on this post is open for discussion with other readers on anything work-related that you want to talk about. If you want an answer from me, emailing me is still your best bet*, but this is a chance to talk to other readers. * If you submitted a question to me recently, please don’t repost it here, as it may be in the to-be-answered queue :). open threads

Here’s an update from Tuesday’s letter-writer whose employer was trying to make her come back in for a “wrap-up meeting” to “finalize her resignation” after her last day, and was also insisting she’d need to pick up her last check in person, contrary to her state’s law: I thought I would update everyone on my situation as it’s been a bit of a whirlwind. First of all, thank you and all the lovely commenters for all their help and suggestions! She has a bit of a reputation for being difficult, but we’d always gotten along pretty well.).

A reader writes: I am a staff member at a university. There is a large student event taking place in a few weeks, and I am tasked with sending reminder emails to students who haven’t properly submitted paperwork for the event. That list of students is generated by the office hosting the event, and I have no access to view which items have been submitted. As per my director’s instructions, I copied each student’s faculty mentor on the email to make them aware that the students were in danger of being dropped from the event. This is really unprofessional.”

A reader writes: I currently work with a coworker who is the same grade as me. like my job and have been only in this department for 6 months. She has been doing this same position for at least 18 months. I am still trying to learn the work, as there is a lot to know. However, my coworker is continually asking me questions about how to do things. It has gotten to the point where she is actually interfering with my learning. realize we need to work in a team environment, but she leaves all the hard tasks to me. Can you offer any advice? advice about your coworkers

If you have an employee who tells you that her workload is too high or who can’t get through everything on her plate, in some cases you’ll know pretty quickly that she’s right; you’ll be able to see for yourself that the workload is indeed overwhelming. But in other cases, you might not feel quite so sure. At Intuit QuickBase’s Fast Track blog today, I talk about how to navigate it when your gut is telling you that the workload should be manageable but your employee is insisting that it’s not. You can read it here. how to say no to a work request are you a bottleneck for your staff?

A reader writes: I am hiring for a position that I will manage. Our office is small (fewer than 20 people), so this individual and I will work together very closely. know selecting interviewees and employees is not truly “fair,” but how much should someone touching on my pet peeves impact the decision to interview someone? For instance, someone sent me a LinkedIn invite a week before their resume was sent to me to consider. I do not send invites to people I don’t know and I don’t accept invites from people I don’t know. ”). hiring

Remember the letter-writer last year whose part-time job kept pressuring her to work more hours ? Here’s the update. have an update for you! The job ended up being very sketchy. As some commenters guessed, it was a indeed a chain of tutoring centers. The commenters made me realize just how bad of a workplace that was, and just how unhappy I was. I’m very glad I wrote to you. Here’s what happened next. kept struggling at the admin job. tried to improve but I kept messing up. We eventually had a desperate need for an English tutor, so I asked if I could retrain as a tutor.

A reader writes: I have an employee who has been working in payroll and purchasing for 2 years with little to no incidents. However, lately there has been a constant stream of mistakes; one in particular required deleting the whole payroll and rekeying it by hand. It is like this employee went home one day and came back the next day and forgot all the knowledge they had obtained. have this person work from their manuals in order to avoid further incidence. Any suggestions on what on earth is going on? You can read my answer to this question — and four others — over at Inc. good management

It’s the Friday open thread! The comment section on this post is open for discussion with other readers on anything work-related that you want to talk about. If you want an answer from me, emailing me is still your best bet*, but this is a chance to talk to other readers. * If you submitted a question to me recently, please don’t repost it here, as it may be in the to-be-answered queue :). open threads

It’s the Friday open thread! The comment section on this post is open for discussion with other readers on anything work-related that you want to talk about. If you want an answer from me, emailing me is still your best bet*, but this is a chance to talk to other readers. * If you submitted a question to me recently, please don’t repost it here, as it may be in the to-be-answered queue :). open threads

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. 1. Prospective employer is asking me to do a major project for free. I’ve been working in a sales role for a brand represented my company. With full support of my existing employer, I have pitched myself to the brand for a future role. It would be a hybrid marketing/sales and management role, all of which I have done in previous jobs. It didn’t exist as a role but I identified gaps in their existing and future markets and thought it was worth a shot. realize that equally they could take the strategy and hire me, but is this normal?

A reader writes: How do you choose a career path? I’m a recent grad as of last May, and I currently have a pretty decent job (in terms of pay and benefits) as an admin at a university library. like my job most days, but a lot of times I feel like it’s not challenging enough for me or like I get all the work for the week done by 8:30 a.m. on Monday. While I’m passionate about the subject and its theory, I’m not so crazy about its application. However, it’s given me extensive writing and critical thinking skills so I really don’t regret it. Well, first, know that this is very common. Start there.

It’s the Friday open thread! The comment section on this post is open for discussion with other readers on anything work-related that you want to talk about. If you want an answer from me, emailing me is still your best bet*, but this is a chance to talk to other readers. * If you submitted a question to me recently, please don’t repost it here, as it may be in the to-be-answered queue :). open threads

It’s the Friday open thread! The comment section on this post is open for discussion with other readers on anything work-related that you want to talk about. If you want an answer from me, emailing me is still your best bet*, but this is a chance to talk to other readers. * If you submitted a question to me recently, please don’t repost it here, as it may be in the to-be-answered queue :). open threads

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. 1. Minimizing the impact of my medical condition on coworkers. have a medical condition that causes pain at night. typical flare-up involves waking up after 3-4 hours of sleep and being unable to fall back asleep due to the pain. If I take painkillers at night, I often can’t make it to work on time because of the sedation. These flare-ups are unpredictable and typically come in clusters, so if I get many in a row the sleep deprivation renders me to unable to do my customer-facing job acceptably. Ask your boss! Or can/should I do better?

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. 1. Is it normal to get a daily memo with feedback on everyone’s performance? write as a reporter for a student newspaper that prints five days a week. We have an advisor whom I’ll call “Joe” who emails individual feedback about our work in mass emails to the whole staff for every paper we print. Joe, a former newspaper reporter, isn’t our boss—or anyone’s boss, really. He’s a paid advisor to our paper who has an office in our newsroom— and he doesn’t directly supervise our work, but he gives us all feedback on our stories, among other duties.

Remember the recent letter-writer who was getting mixed messages about whether she needed to work overtime on the weekends, even though she had negotiated no overtime when she was hired? Here’s the update. I met with my manager and reminded him of our discussion when I transitioned from a temp to full-time employee last August. He didn’t remember the conversation at all and insisted he would have advised me not to take the position. So it goes. Since then, we’ve been told our work on Saturday is not mandatory but meeting our long-term deadline depends on it. Thanks everyone!

By popular demand! When I wrote last month about tough work personalities, including people who naysay every idea, a bunch of people asked for advice on how to raise legitimate concerns without seeming like you have negative spin on every new suggestion. At Intuit QuickBase’s Fast Track blog today, I talk about how to bring problems to the surface without becoming the office Eeyore. You can read it here. work habits

A reader writes: Can the company I work for tell us that we have to answer our cell phones while we are on vacation?  I asked if I would get vacation time back if I do, and the answer was no. They say because they pay the phone bill, we have to answer the calls no matter what. thought the purpose of a vacation is that you unplug from work. You can read my answer to this question over at Inc. today , where I’m revisiting letters that have been buried in the archives here from years ago (and often updating/expanding my answers to them). was originally published by Alison Green on Ask a Manager.

Last month , we talked about how managers should handle snow days. Today — particularly timely since it’s snowing here today — here’s a round-up of advice from the employee side of things: whether you have to be paid for snow days if you don’t work, whether you can be made to use a vacation day when your office closes for snow,  and lots of other aspects of snow days. And yes, this is in part because today’s a holiday and it’s an easy post.). Everything you need to know about how your employer can (and should) handle snow days. workplace practices

It’s four answers to four questions. Here we go…. 1. Would it be unreasonable to block people from walking through my office? I’m the manager of a medium business, with 15 full-time and 6 part-time employees in addition to myself. Our building has just been renovated, and it has changed the layout a lot. Three doors now lead off the foyer: the bathroom, the hallway to the general work areas, and my office. The trouble is that our new break room is where an old storeroom used to be, with one door leading into a work area and the other directly into my office. Here are my options: 1.

It’s the Friday open thread! The comment section on this post is open for discussion with other readers on anything work-related that you want to talk about. If you want an answer from me, emailing me is still your best bet*, but this is a chance to talk to other readers. * If you submitted a question to me recently, please don’t repost it here, as it may be in the to-be-answered queue :). open threads

A reader writes: I’m hoping you can help me with this humiliating situation I’ve gotten myself into. Two months ago at the company holiday party, I got blackout drunk and made a fool of myself. Nothing fireable, but I was literally falling-over drunk. I did some embarrassing drunk dancing, inappropriate joking around, and a LOT of cursing (not AT anyone, just in my speech, when I’m usually very buttoned-up at work). I am so deeply ashamed and horrified at my behavior. realized that I have a drinking problem and I need help. Meanwhile at work, no one will let it go.

It’s four answers to four questions (well, three plus an update). Here we go…. 1. Manager posted list of names of people who are always on time to work. Recently my supervisor posted a list with five names out of the 22 people who work in our dept as “being on time 100% of the time.” ” I feel like this a little bit passive aggressive shaming of employees who were tardy. Granted, we have a few who are late 100% of the time, but some are late by one minute once! Your thoughts would be appreciated. Should I give a reference for a former coworker who wasn’t very good?

It’s the Friday open thread! The comment section on this post is open for discussion with other readers on anything work-related that you want to talk about. If you want an answer from me, emailing me is still your best bet*, but this is a chance to talk to other readers. * If you submitted a question to me recently, please don’t repost it here, as it may be in the to-be-answered queue :). open thread – February 5-6, 2016 was originally published by Alison Green on Ask a Manager. open threads

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. 1. My boss said I could have time off as long as it wasn’t for an interview. The company I work for has had a lot of changes recently. We changed corporate companies, and the new company lacks vision and leadership. Furthermore, the general manager, assistant general manager, and even my boss have left the company. work in HR and I am the only line-level associate in that position. Since my boss left, I have taken on a great deal more work and have worked 10 Saturdays since October. more an hour. It has great benefits and is even closer to home.

It’s four answers to four questions. Here we go…. 1. Boss confiscates food gifts meant for others. We have outside acquaintances that we work with, who gift us with goodies to share amongst myself and staff members. However, my boss takes the goodies and hides them from us. When we bring it to her attention as to where they are, she tell us to get our own stuff (like the coffee pods) and that we don’t need to eat the sweets (her excuse-we’ve had plenty of goodies bestowed to us around the holidays). Applying for my old job at my old company. How can I convey that in my cover letter?

Over at Intuit QuickBase today, I talk about the most common time management personality types and what strategies each type can use to make better use of your time, whether you’re a procrastinator, a chronic under-estimator, a fire fighter, or more. Take a look and see if you spot yourself here. what’s your time management personality type? was originally published by Alison Green on Ask a Manager. work habits

A reader writes: I’ve just had my last interview for a new job in a very niche area. There aren’t many experts in this area — so chances are that I would know, or at least be familiar with, most of the other candidates. If they were competitive enough to get an interview, they are a probably a current customer or a competitor of the product I sell today. If I get and accept an offer, do you think it would be weird or inappropriate to ask my new boss who the other candidates were? I’m not interested in patting myself on the back and gloating that I was chosen over anyone.

It’s four answers to four questions. Here we go…. 1. My friend tried to get me to lie as a reference for him. Recently a friend (now ex-friend) used me as a reference for a director position. He lied and said that I was his former boss from a previous job! have never been his boss or manager for any job. only know him personally and know he is a good director from what he tells me, but I also know why he was fired from his last job. He was let go for having sexual relationships with some of his employees. checked, and he never went to USC or played for the Trojans. What do you think?

A reader writes: I work at a small nonprofit with no dedicated HR rep. Last year, we were trying to hire an entry-level role. For a number of reasons, the process went on much longer than expected. We had to extend the deadline several times, then put the search on hold to focus on hiring for a more urgent position, and then decided to repost the job. In total (from posting to having the offer accepted), it took about six months, which was not what we’d planned on or hoped for. We’d been understaffed for quite a while and indicated our desire to move quickly with candidates. hirin

I’ve worked with and for a lot of bad managers in my career. consider them anti-mentors: bosses who were so bad that they unwittingly formed the start of my thinking on management, by providing a perfect model of what not to do. Over at Inc. today, I talk about those bad bosses and why I’m grateful to them. (Note: Note: My columns for Inc. are generally pulled from my archives here. This one was originally printed here in 2008.). Also, a note about my articles at Inc.: If you’re outside the U.S. or using an ad blocker, Inc. good management

Over at Intuit QuickBase’s Fast Track blog today, I take a look at several big work-related stories in the news right now: the exact cost of a toxic employee, collaboration overload, and more.  You can read it here. the exact cost of a toxic employee, collaboration overload, and more was originally published by Alison Green on Ask a Manager. workplace practices

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. 1. Cutting Cutting the salary of a disappointing new hire. We hired an employee almost two months ago who seemed to have quite a lot of experience in our field (which is rare in our city). She asked for a higher salary than entry-level, which we were okay with giving based on her experience. Essentially, we regret paying her the higher salary and feel that she isn’t worth it. Legally, we know that we can reduce it a bit, but should we? And if so, how do we handle that situation? She is at $60k. Entry level for us is $45k, possibly $50k.

We all have certain fallback phrases that we pull out at work over and over – but some of them can be seriously annoying to coworkers (“gentle reminder,” anyone?) and alarming to managers. At U.S. News & World Report today, I talk about eight phrases that you might use at work without thinking much about them, but which are worth removing from your office vocabulary. You can read it here. phrases to remove from your work vocabulary was originally published by Alison Green on Ask a Manager. work habits

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. 1. My friends think I should bash an employer on Twitter. went abroad to get my master’s, finished, I’m doing also an internship abroad, and now I am looking for a job. filled out an online application (taleo system) for a large multinational consumer goods corporation in my home country. I am a national of that country, so obviously I can work there. However, I got an email a week ago that says that they can’t consider me because I am not allowed to work there. tried to reply, but their email does not accept replies.

We have a winner! 4,041  votes are in, and the worst boss of the year is the manager who  penalized an employee for objecting to being called “baby mama,” the c-word, and other names  … with 45% of the vote. Congratulations, terrible manager of the year! You suck. the worst boss of 2015 is… was originally published by Alison Green on Ask a Manager

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. 1. Should our office stop collecting money for cards and cakes when people leave? In my office, there is a custom that when a colleague leaves, folks in the office contribute a few dollars towards a card, a farewell cake, or similar. It used to be mostly informal with someone doing the rounds with cap in hand. Is it appropriate? More importantly, the HR manager has recently started coordinating this initiative — with all the best intentions, but I’m afraid it may seem like an imposition if it comes from an HR person. During that day?

We’ve read about plenty of bad bosses this year, and now it’s time to vote on the worst one of the whole year. We’ll crown the worst boss of the year next week, based on your votes … so please vote below. Voting ends at 11:59 p.m. Sunday night.). vote for the worst boss of 2015 was originally published by Alison Green on Ask a Manager. jerks

Here are three updates from letter-writers who had their questions answered here this year. 1. My friend is a terrible coworker. I did take your advice (and the advice and input from some of the commenters) and apologized to my friend about how I’d handled the gossip situation. told her I was worried about her. (A little background I see didn’t make it into my original message – she’d actually spent some time in the hospital last year with still-unexplained heart failure.) really appreciated readers weighing in. consider myself lucky in that regard. updates

A reader writes: I’m in a new position, which I enjoy. Of course, no job is perfect, and there’s a curious issue I’m not sure how to handle: What do you think is the line between exaggerating and lying? And, when does it need to be addressed in a “managing up” situation when it’s a direct supervisor doing it? Some of my manager’s exaggerations are not work-related. For example, my supervisor said, “G. ate FIVE cupcakes!” ” when I ate one. blew it off with a smile and something like, “They were so rich, one was enough.” ”).

Two housekeeping notes for you: 1. Ads. I’ve been experimenting with some different ad formats over the last week (taking advantage of the fact that December traditionally has lower traffic, so it’s the least bad time to do it). You’ll notice, for instance, that there’s a new ad box above the comments section (except on mobile devices), and I’m experimenting with options for ads on mobile. But I do need to keep up with changing ad trends because the site needs to generate revenue to support the amount of time and upkeep needed to keep it alive. New commenting feature.

Here are three updates from letter-writers who had their questions answered here this year. 1. My coworker insists that I’m mad at her. In the end, I took Alison’s advice to avoid engaging in any sort of third party coworker mediation. She asked to be moved and was relocated to a different part of the office. This made things awkward, to say the least, as everyone was understandably curious about why she had moved. My manager never said anything to me about it, and I avoided talking about it or her to anyone else. It’s been pretty quiet since then. 2. steeled myself an braced for the worst.

Remember the letter-writer whose new coworker kept making graphically violent “jokes” ? Here’s the update. Thanks to your advice, things for the most part worked out, but not in the most ideal way. went to talk to him again, explained why I wasn’t okay with dealing with the problem in a more direct way, and he begrudgingly agreed. ” I was appalled! My coworker just looked stunned, and we both went back to work. He seemed to take it to heart and never said anything like that to me again. updates

A reader writes: I currently work full-time at a large retail store as a department lead (no real management responsibilities). oversee the department, order and stock product, plan and build displays, and other various duties. I was promoted to the position three months ago, after six months in a part-time position. enjoy my job, but it is physically exhausting and the schedule is unpredictable and often requires me to work weekends/early mornings/late evenings. would like to eventually move into a more professional setting with a more traditional schedule. Temping. Volunteering.

A reader writes: My sister has an employee with a long history of inappropriate emotional responses to situations. For example, my sister will ask Jane to adopt a more professional communication style in meetings, and Jane will say/text/IM “I don’t know how you can ask me such a thing” or “I should not have to tell you what’s wrong if you don’t know” or “I will just have to stop telling you how I feel, since you never listen.”. Recently, they were at a work retreat and Jane had to leave early, before group transportation would be available.

It’s Thanksgiving, so in place of regular posts the rest of the day, here are some holiday posts from the past to enjoy. 1. punched a coworker at the company Christmas party. 2. company is banning alcohol at its holiday party, even if we buy it ourselves. 3. my manager insists on assigning seats at a holiday lunch that we pay for ourselves. 4. your 10 funniest workplace holiday disasters (includes the origin of Hanukkah balls!). 5. do I really have to attend my office holiday party? 6. my office Secret Santa gave me a sex toy. 7. how can I tell my staff not to give me holiday gifts?

A reader writes: Let me start by saying I love my office and I love my job, but sometimes management gets a little weird about handling conflict. We have a small pool of coworkers who are up for an internal promotion, and one of the candidates has caused nothing but drama. She claims that other members of the office are causing discord because we used to all take breaks together and that’s beginning to taper off. In reality, she’s the one causing the discord. It’s always been whoever wants to show up in our agreed upon lunch area can, and she’s been here long enough to know that.) What?!

A reader writes: I just started a new job last week. I was able to successfully negotiate an extra week of vacation, but now I am being told by HR that the internal company recruiter who authorized the extra vacation had no right to do so and that the company will not honor that extra week. showed them the email chain, and they say it doesn’t matter, it’s against company policy to negotiate with vacation time. I had other offers when I accepted this position and now I am pissed. What should I do? What?! I am outraged on your behalf, letter-writer. This is ridiculous.

This is slightly different than the questions I usually tackle here, in that it’s much more about customer service, but I thought it was interesting. reader writes: I have been searching all over the internet for an answer to a customer service challenge that I’m running into, and all I find are generic responses. Yes, I know you must be empathetic and fully engaged with the customer, while also listening intently and patiently to the customer’s explanation of their experience in order to come up with the best solution to handle the situation at hand. Here is this situation.

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. 1. Dealing with a lazy and difficult coworker. have a coworker who’s become comfortable in her job, meaning that she knows she is retiring in several years and seems to have thrown in the towel. My problem is the unprofessionalism in the office. Her job is to great visitors, but she sits at her desk with ear buds in and a scowl. Everyone now comes to me. We are to open the office at 8 am, and she arrives at 8:07-8:15 (mind you, I get a 1- and 3-year-old ready, to daycare, and still arrive 10 minutes early). The issue is your boss.

A reader writes: Long story short, we had an opening in the small office I work at (there’s only four of us) back in May. approached a close friend of mine who was unhappy with his job, and who I knew had been looking for a new position for 2+ years. explained the position, the office, and answered any questions he had, being as forthcoming and blunt as possible about it all. He said he was interested in the job, even knowing he would be taking a small pay cut to come here. My boss then interviewed him and decided to hire him. Well, he’s putting you in a really crappy position.

A reader writes: Is it okay to leave the office right at 5 p.m.? feel silly for asking, but more and more I feel as though it’s frowned upon to come in right at 9 and leave right at 5. I’ve been at my job for about 4 years now. In the beginning, I was always early to work and never batted an eyelash if a project required me to stay late. Along the way, though, I got married and had a baby. Before my daughter was born, when it was just me and my husband, I never really watched the clock. Now that I have a family, I am out the door right at 5 p.m. Is that a crime? every day?

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. 1. My coworker got a vendor’s employee fired … and I want to help the fired employee. work for a company that hires an outside company to run our mailroom. When the guy who had worked in our mailroom retired, that company sent a replacement, Kathy. We loved her; she was breath of fresh air, very approachable and easy to work with. She had an excellent work ethic and always eager to help the staff in our building. But that’s not what happened. She tends to pick on people, and I am speaking from experience. ” 3. Any tips or advice?

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. 1. My coworkers are joking that I got my promotion by sleeping with my boss. have been working in a French start-up for the past six months. Most of the employees here are 20-30 years old, and the atmosphere is relaxed and informal. have always had very good and friendly relationships with my colleagues. Three weeks ago, my boss (who also is the founder of the company) promoted me to a managing position, which is especially unusual given my young age and his habitual reluctance to hand down responsabilities. That’s ridiculous. If so, how?

Boss’s Day is this Friday, and it’s time to kill it. If you’ve never heard of Boss’s Day, count yourself lucky. While it hasn’t infiltrated every office in the country yet, it’s growing in popularity and spreading fast. The idea is to mark a particular day to show appreciation to managers for the work they do. But the day is a crock, and it’s time to retire it. At U.S. News & World Report today, I talk about why — as well as what you can do if this mockery of a holiday rears its head in your office. You can read it here. workplace practices

A reader writes: I’m writing to you about an employee from another company. work in a mall and our store is located next to a famous electronics chain. In keeping with the tea theme, let’s call them Earl Grey Electronics. One of EGE’s employees is a regular in our store. Unfortunately, despite working in the retail industry, she’s a terrible customer. She does the usual rude customer things like destroying neatly folded piles of clothes and demanding that we check the back for stock we told her we don’t have. But last night she finally went too far.

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. 1. Employee is taking all his vacation days at our busiest time of year. I am a first-time manager and have a question on how to discuss vacation time with one of my employees. We have a use it or lose it vacation day policy based on calendar year. The employee in question, Bob, has 15 vacation days and was hired before I came to be his manager. Last week, Bob put in a vacation request to use all 15 days in December around the holidays, resulting in four work weeks off at the same time. I was shocked. How do I have this conversation with Bob?

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. 1. My new job wants me to sign a paper agreeing they can dismiss me without investigation if they suspect theft. recently took a position that I’m very excited about and am about a week into the two-week training process. They agreed and made an offer knowing about all of that. Today one of the trainers informed me that an HR person was looking for me to get me to sign a form but we kept missing one another. Is this a standard thing that I have just somehow avoided? No, it’s not standard. Thank you so much for your interest in Teapot Inc.

A reader writes: My consulting business is finally picking up after years of being stagnant. I’m getting to the point where I’m getting more work and more clients than I can handle, and I’m thinking it might be time to look towards bringing someone on board to help me. This person would be another professional doing the same work I currently do. My goal has always been to scale up my business, and this seems like a good time to work on doing that. This is presented as something that will happen with 100% certainty. I’ve been told “you should expect this to happen.”

A reader writes: I have a great supervisor who is also somewhat of a people-pleaser. She likes to see the bright side of everything and give people the benefit of the doubt, which is great, but lately I am wondering if she is going to hurt my reputation by refusing to defend me against other people. Recently she has shared with me several instances of other people telling her they were upset with me, while acknowledging (to me) that I didn’t actually do anything wrong. ” I checked in with both of them again before I left to make sure they knew the plan. But he told me to tell you.

This comment section is open for any non-work-related discussion you’d like to have with other readers, by popular demand. This one is truly no work and no school. If you have a work question, you can email it to me or post it in the work-related open thread on Fridays.). Book Recommendation of the Week: The Namesake , by Jhumpa Lahiri. This is from the author of Interpreter of Maldies , which won a Pulitzer, but I will boldly assert that this one is better. Also, that was short stories and this is a novel, and in a literary street fight, the novel will always win.). open threads

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. 1. Coworker didn’t warn us about bed bugs when we traveled to satellite office. work at a place with two offices. There is a group of professionals in our office who meet up every month to discuss trends in our field of work. We normally meet at the main office, but one of the employees in the group asked that we rotate back, at least once, to the satellite office. Well, the whole group (75% of whom works at the main office) agreed that they would rotate and have the meeting at the satellite office. How should I approach this situation?

A reader writes: I work for a very high-profile nonprofit as one of the “people on the ground” (aka, the people who get paid the least to do most of the work that is the nonprofit’s claim to fame). I’m fine with the low pay, especially because I love the work we do and believe in its importance, but it does mean that my coworkers and I are all really broke 20-somethings right out of college with limited professional experience. ” Which I thought was weird, but having already agreed, I went to the meeting. For me, this is an ethical issue. How do I approach this?

A reader writes: I have a new boss. Every month, we have an informal “catch-up” scheduled where I am supposed to: * showcase an accomplishment. name a weakness. discuss the strengths and weaknesses of the boss (guess what’s never actually discussed). We’ve had one catch-up, and when pressed for a weakness, I instead shifted the conversation to be about a longer-term goal. He told me this was a cop out. asked him to name my weakness, and he said it was up to me to do it. How do I handle the “name the weakness”? But the framing your boss is using … well, it sucks.

A reader writes: I got a voicemail today for a reference check on a former coworker / casual friend. I had no idea this call was coming, but I’ve been in management for a few years and get these often enough, so it’s not a big deal. So I reached out to him asking for some background and whether this was a personal or professional reference. He responded saying that she mentioned us working together years ago and asking if I could put in a good word, yadda yadda yadda. Then he forwarded me his resume. There is a paragraph longer than this email detailing it. What the fudge?

A reader writes: My supervisor (who was in upper level management) gave his notice two days ago. We found out yesterday, and this morning around 10 a.m. he was apparently escorted from the building. I don’t know the details because I didn’t find out until around 1 p.m. We haven’t been told anything, and our team lead was supposed to have a meeting with our new supervisor at the end of the day, but instead she went to a management meeting, so we know nothing. thought this was one of the best companies I’d ever worked for, and now I just feel like a naiive fool.

A reader writes: I work in a seven-person county department. Our work is client-facing, and we handle inquiries by email, phone, and walk-in. We have one full-time employee, Tyrion, who has been on intermittent FMLA for years. The absences are unpredictable, and always just a day or two at a time. It’s difficult to work around, but we’ve managed to cover so far. The problem is, we now have a second employee, Cersei, who is also on intermittent FMLA, with similar unpredictable absences. Due to the nature of our work and budget constraints, temps are not feasible. When does the bottom drop out?

A reader writes: We recently started having a “holiday party” after several years of not having any kind of employee gathering. All employees are invited and encouraged to attend. Each employee is permitted to bring a “guest,” which is generally their significant other if they have one. At last year’s party, our director spoke for about 45 minutes about company direction, plans for the upcoming year, and other work specific topics. The director feels that he wants the guests/significant others to truly understand what the employees do and feel invested in the company too. workplace practices

Remember the letter-writer last year who was trying to figure out how to fire a frustrating, high-maintenance client who was likely to take it personally? Here’s the update. It went down as I didn’t expect – she got in a snit over a project (and by snit, I mean borderline abusive) and it made it easy for me to cut the cord, which I did as politely as possible, giving her everything she’d need to finish the project with another writer. And just like that, she was gone. But that’s not the update. really love my clients, guys! No more abuse. updates

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. 1. Should I stop baking for my husband’s coworkers? read your post from 2012 about why it could be a bad thing to bake for coworkers. Here is my situation: I bake for my husband’s coworkers. I am a stay-at-home mom/housewife, and I always thought it was a nice gesture for him to take home-baked goods to his coworkers. However, my husband told me last time it was awkward. No one ate any and never said anything about it. Did I offend them or make his life more difficult? want to know what is appropriate. Your advice would be greatly appreciated!

A reader writes: I’m hoping you could help me with some questions I have about a volunteer position I’ve been doing for about 1.5 years now. It’s a newsletter/communications position for one of the departments (Department A) of a local nonprofit that I really admire. developed the newsletter program and it was a great experience, but after my supervisor changed last fall, the position has become kind of frustrating for me. My first question is, what’s an appropriate time/way to tell her? But it really was bewildering. Well, first, tell her you’re leaving now. Can you ?”

A reader writes: I work two part-time jobs. have been at Job #1 almost a year, and I work Tuesdays/Thursdays. At Job #2, where I’ve been for a month, I am a floating admin between a few of their centers. I was explicitly told this job was three days a week, and my schedule there so far has been Wednesday/Friday/Saturday. Recently, my boss at Job #2 asked me if I could work Mondays as well. This is not ideal for me, because then my only day off would be Sunday. So I told her that, unfortunately, I could not work Mondays. You’re free on Mondays!” Other times, it may not.

Traditionally, to move up professionally, people eventually need to move into a management role. But what should companies do with top performers who want to grow but who aren’t interested in managing people? When companies don’t provide career paths for people who don’t want to manage, they’re more likely to lose good employees — and plus, when you force people to manage others in order to grow professionally, you end up with poorly managed teams being led by people who were better at doing something else. You can read it here. good management

A reader writes: I recently resigned from my first job, which was a seasonal sales position. Upon quitting, my manager told me I cannot put this work experience down on my resume, nor can she be my reference since I did not work for 3 months (seasonal positions are for 2 months). I was also forbidden from asking my coworkers for references as well. The real reason I quit was because she was would verbally abuse me even when I was excelling in my role (I told her it was because I had to start school so I couldn’t continue working, which was half true at the time). references

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. 1. My new employer lied to me about salary. recently started a new job, which pays me pretty laughable amount but I accepted it because I was told it was at the mid-range point for the position, and I was offered a mid-range wage because of my experience. Well, today I was finally able to access financial documents for my institution that outline salaries for all positions, and lo-and-behold I discover that I am NOT being paid mid-range, but am in fact paid pennies above the bottom 25th percentile. Or maybe the document you saw is wrong.

And now a break to talk about a sponsor…. Remember all those horror stories about remote work gone bad? Here’s a way to knock out lots of those concerns and make it easy to collaborate and manage remote work: Igloo , an awesome corporate intranet that’s probably much different from other intranets you’ve seen. But Igloo  is far from the traditional intranet. It’ll let you access content anywhere and at any time, without compromising on security. That means that you don’t have to be stuck at your desk to do your work. It’s also interactive, incredibly easy to use, and super customizable.

A reader writes: I am an adult who has a crush on someone (also an adult) who works in retail. He may be a manager. He’s rung me up (cash register, not phone) multiple times and we’ve done the usual chitchat, and when I’m at his store he very obviously stares at me and often pops up in the areas that I’m shopping in. If you were interested in a customer, what would you do about it? What would think if one of your employees asked out a customer? What do you think about customers asking you out? should I ask out an employee at a store where I shop? workplace practices

A reader writes: I am a newly promoted manager and am stumped on how to handle something bizarre that happened in a meeting today, primarily because my sense of humor is getting in the way. asked one of my employees to explain the progress he’s made in the assignment he’s been working on, and he said, “I would love to tell you…in song.” ” He proceeded to pull out a harmonica and “find his note,” before erupting into a musical ditty explaining everything in detail. It was so weird…that I did not know how to respond in the moment.

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. 1. I get embarrassingly emotional when criticized. recently finished grad school and I’m in my first full-time position and I start managing twelve employees next month, and I’ve been reading as many books and blogs in managing as possible. My question for you is this. love feedback and I’ve been accustomed to giving and receiving it in grad school. Usually it’s over email and addresses written work. The thing is, when I’m constructively criticized, I get embarrassingly over emotional. hours. Very embarrassing!

A reader writes: I have a question about an interview I had recently. I am an experienced IT Infrastructure manager (running teams of up to 30) with project management experience – and was invited to an interview on the strength of my CV, which clearly stated that I was a “PRINCE2 certified IT Infrastructure Manager with five years management experience and ten years technical experience for both public- and private-sector employers.” ” It also had the dates of my PRINCE2 qualification – which was by this point two years old. Why don’t we wrap up here?”.

A reader writes: I am an office manager and am responsible for distributing the mail at my office. The mail in my office building is delivered inconsistently (different mail carriers, inconsistent delivery times, delivered to the wrong office suite, etc.). It happens at least once per month where our mail gets delivered to another office/company on our floor. The office manager of that company gets a pile of mail, flips over the whole stack without reading the addressee, opens everything with her letter opener, and then distributes it at her company. She has never replied. workplace practices

Here’s an update from Monday’s letter-write whose colleagues  charged a honeymoon suite to her company credit card : HR was going to follow up on the issue with them, and then possibly their managers, but she wanted to see if there was a better way to pay the company back, so she casually asked the CFO (it’s a small enough company that he directly oversees Accounting). He was genuinely surprised that our Travel & Expenses policy prohibits using package deals when traveling (I guess I’m not the only one who didn’t know it was in the T&E policy). updates

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. 1. Employee gets drunk and belligerent on business trips. need to know the proper way to handle the fact that one of our employees drinks at night while on the road with the crew. Our company pays for the hotel rooms and the guys bunk two to a room. We are getting complaints that one of the guys drinks every night and becomes loud and belligerent and it is difficult for the other employees to share a room with him. What’s going on?”. …. That means that if I get further reports of this, we will need to _.” Are employee referrals effective?

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. 1. Am I allowed to drink my boss’s fancy water in the office kitchen? My office supplies drinks for the employees, typically water, juice, coffee, tea, ect. These are purchased by the assistant once a month on her company card and stocked in the communal kitchen fridge. Recently, the head manager in the office decided he really liked this fancy water, $3/bottle water that has some additives to help him with a condition he’s dealing with. Note that she is using her company card to buy this water, at the manager’s request. were fine.

A reader writes: I’m a year out of undergrad, and spent the first year in a job that pays well and has great work-life balance, but the work itself is heavily administrative and I hate it. studied/interned as a writer and editor and have hoped to find my way into editorial/magazine type positions. I’ve been looking for opportunities in my city (D.C.) and found a editorial assistant position that I am completely qualified for. So I submitted my resume and cover letter and heard back within a day with an invitation to have a preliminary phone interview. He then didn’t reply.

A reader writes: I’m in a long distance relationship. live in New York, while my boyfriend of one year and a couple of months lives in Nevada. want to surprise him next year in March 2016 for his birthday with a surprise visit to his job. He’s a great employee, never late, and rarely takes a sick day unless he’s seriously sick. thought to ask his manager if I could maybe wait within the office and ask that he’s called in and would see me in there? Or maybe go in as a customer for the ride he operates and surprise him. Not sure. Maybe you’re a stalker. Who knows.

A reader writes: As an avid reader of your column, I’ve read multiple articles outlining the differences between “ tattling ” vs bringing an important issue in front of management that impacts work product. This issue is clearly on the non-tattling business impact side, and yet I’m still struggling with how to handle it, and I am hoping you can help me. have a coworker who I depend on for data for a recurring project (requires major updates two times per year). And every. single. Colleague is always apologetic. Colleague is a really nice guy, and I like him personally.

A reader writes: I’m an admin at a company and we have two employees, who I will call Jon and Ygritte. Ygritte was hired recently as a referral from Jon, to whom she is newly wed. Both are remote employees in different reporting structures and both have hard to find credentials. As part of Ygritte coming on, they had to move to a different part of the country and had related credit issues that come with getting a mortgage. During that time, I was booking Ygritte’s hotels on my corporate card for her. book the hotel, all is fine. So here’s my dilemma. What should I do?

This comment section is open for any non-work-related discussion you’d like to have with other readers, by popular demand. This one is truly no work and no school. If you have a work question, you can email it to me or post it in the work-related open thread on Fridays.). Book Recommendation of the Week: Emma , by Jane Austen. Because it is the perfect book, and Mr. Knightley is a better love interest than Mr. Darcy. weekend free-for-all – July 11-12, 2015 was originally published by Alison Green on Ask a Manager. updates

Remember the letter-writer last December who — on her first day filling in for someone going out on leave — was given a list of ridiculous rules by the person she was covering for ? Here’s the update. I did speak to the company director within the first week to ask his opinion of the list of “rules” Miss A had left me and about how he wanted me to proceed with running the department. That’s when the whole story of Miss A and her team came out.none of which I’d been informed of prior to starting. If I’d had, I would have run for the highlands!

A reader writes: My former workplace was the kind of place where it was very difficult to take any sort of vacation time — we were super understaffed and had extremely heavy workloads. Nonetheless, I never leave any vacation time on the table, so come hell or high water I was taking mine. I’d planned a week long vacation and went to great pains to arrange my workload so that my absence would have a minimal impact on any projects. ” I verbally went over these details with people and followed up with emails. ” Well, my manager didn’t like this at ALL.

A reader writes: I am a new hourly intern at an office. One of my interviewers, and now boss, knows me on a somewhat personal level; her daughter and I have been friends since high school. We (my boss and I) didn’t see each other all of the time, as my friend is kind of flighty and flaky, and even then, I didn’t spend a lot of time around her, but her daughter mentioned the internship to me and I expressed an interest. Note: her daughter hasn’t worked here and does not work here now. As far as I know, no one has said anything or passed the information along.

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…. 1. My boss lied to a client about getting engaged. My boss recently visited some of my clients who were out of state. In an effort to build rapport, he told them he was planning to propose to his girlfriend over the weekend. (I’m not sure why he wouldn’t talk about the weather or sports, but whatever). He has no intentions of proposing, and did not propose that weekend. He asked me to send the follow-up materials to the client, and when I did, she replied and cc’d him and asked how the proposal went.  This is where it gets weird.

A reader writes: I’m wondering if you can settle a rather heated discussion between me and my boyfriend? The background:   A couple of years ago my friend was doing a post-degree certificate in HR through a reputable (but mid-sized local) community college. Just before the end of the fall semester, her fellow students decided to have a Christmas party and invited all the students in the cohort as well as all the professors and some admin staff to attend. The party was held at Hooters. believe there were about 30 people in total, with about 10 professors/admin. What?! Supreme Court.

A reader writes: I work in a team of mostly men and a few women. We’ve been invited to the boss’ home for a barbecue, which includes team activities, bbq, and a pool (!) The boss was clear that we should bring our swimsuits. Being one of the only women (and one of two who are under 40), I make sure that I dress professionally at work. I’m concerned if I do bring my swimsuit that despite the casual and pool party context, I will still be viewed differently when everyone see me more exposed. what should I wear to an office pool party? advice about your coworkers

A reader writes: I work in a very small office, doing a series of specific technical projects, reporting to a very young, recent-graduate manager who doesn’t have any experience in my area. I am regularly asked to complete projects in ridiculous timeframes. For instance, a project that I (and other peers) would normally budget around 30 days for, I am asked to complete in 4-12 days. Usually I get a barrage of micromanaging questions: why does it take this much time? Why can’t you do it in the time frame? Why does that take so much time? Shouldn’t it take you x time to do y?

A reader writes: My director supports me on this and is on my side, but didn’t offer any assistance, so I’m seeking your advice. For the last year and a half, I have been working as an IT manager for a large corporation, and oversee multiple locations throughout the Midwest. The company just restructured, and I have taken on the role of three people through a sideways promotion (same title and pay with more responsibilities…it sucks). My main office is based in one of these three locations. We don’t know what you are doing. So … can you share your calendar?